The Cost of One-Sided Relationships

​Many of us have read the book of Judges (Judges 16; 1 – 26) with the account of Samson, and thought “how can someone do that”? Well in reality it did happen. Reading this recently, l saw something different.
Judges 16;4 says it all “And it came to pass afterward, that he loved a woman in the valley of Sorek, whose name was Delilah”. This verse clearly states that “he loved a woman”, however it is very clear from the account that Delilah did not love him.

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​When the Lords of the Philistines approached Delilah to find out Samson’s strength (Judges 16;5) , she would not have cooperated with their plans if she loved him. She could have simply informed Samson and see how she should have delivered him from their plans, and not cooperate with them.

We have no evidence and do not know whether or not Samson married her. All the bible tells us is that “he loved her”. Unfortunately this love was not reciprocal; otherwise she would have not pressed him so hard and even get money for a reward (Judges 16; 4- 18). Delilah did not love Samson and she took advantage of his love for her. This was a one sided relationship.

The love that Samson had for Delilah was not reciprocal, it blinded him and he was not able to make rational decisions.

Sometimes in life we like a person but the feeling is not mutual. It can be any form of relationship. Nine out of ten times, such relationships end up being a waste of time. It’s just a matter of time before the truth is revealed.

Sometimes we need to step back and make realistic assessments about some relationships.  Are they really worth keeping?

I am not talking about marriage here because marriage is a covenant. From this account, it does not appear that Samson married Delilah. The only account we have of Samson having a wife is stated in Judges 14; 2 &10.

I am talking about day to day relationships that you know are one-sided.

While the consequences are not likely to be this drastic, a person who has no interest in you nor in your friendship is a waste of time. Ask the Lord to give you wisdom. You may need to release the person and let them go.
 
One-sided relationships as we can see from Samson's account;

• Can blind a person from making rational decisions
• Can be detrimental
• Opens a person up to manipulation

 
The remedy of not failing foul to this is to receive the acceptance of the Lord. We are all precious in His sight. We have been accepted by Him (Ephesians 1;6).
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 “One sided relationships most times end up being a waste of time, irrespective of who the person is, you may need to let them go”.
 
Remember that you are loved by the Lord and precious in His sight. Make a realistic assessment of your relationships, commit them unto the Lord and let go of those that need to go.
 
Bisi Oladipupo

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